My name is Jess. I'm 21 years old and am a senior at UVM. I'm studying elementary and special ed., and currently work as a support person for three different people with disabilities. I have bulimia, and have been in recovery for quite some time. The first time my eating disorder surfaced I was in the 8th grade. I was able to not engage in any eating disorder behaviors throughout high school (although I realize in retrospect how disordered my thinking and body image was) but during my senior year of high school and once I started college, the bulimia got really bad. I was able to be okay for my freshman year and most of my sophomore year. But around April of my sophomore year, I totally sunk into a vicious cycle of binging and purging. I thought that going to New Zealand in June of that year to study abroad would fix all of my problems, that my eating disorder would not come with me. I was so wrong. It got worse in New Zealand, and when I got home, I participated in a five-week intensive outpatient program before returning to UVM for second semester of my junior year. During that semester, I made a lot of progress. However, I still struggle every single day. I am starting this blog at a really big transition time and a time of high stress. Those are two of my biggest triggers, so I think that the act of sharing what I am going through with others in the hope that they can resonate with things I am going with and that this can help them as well is my goal. I hope that this blog will keep me motivated towards recovery as well. Ask me anything. And if you are reading this and think that you can't go on, I promise that you can. I have been to the lowest of lows, and now I am on the other side. Moving slowly, but I'm still moving. And you can do. Just please don't give up. Because recovery is so incredibly worth it.